Dear Santa,

Hi Santa, I know it’s been a while since I’ve written to you, but now that I have this blog, I feel like it will finally reach you up there in the North Pole (you just really can’t trust USPS these days you know).

I also realize it’s kind of late to be writing to you, since you must already be finishing your rounds in Japan and Australia at the moment. But it’s the 21st Century, so surely you have a laptop with you on that sleigh? And I’m positive that you subscribe to our feed via Google Reader, like all loyal Bosh readers do, right?!

How is your health? Elaine must have caught something bad because she threw up yesterday (how embarrassing…) and I hope you didn’t catch the same thing. Are you and the missus still enjoying an invigorating sex life? If not, I can forward you one of those e-mails I always get, you just gotta ask.

You see Santa, this Christmas, I’m not even going to ask you for anything (especially since I’ve already received everything I ever could’ve wanted, i.e. The “Showgirls” VIP Box Edition, and BRITNEY SPEARS TICKETS). This Christmas is all going to be about you.

So Santa, to help you out a bit, here is a list of people you shouldn’t even BOTHER visiting tonight. Don’t even waste your precious time on these naughty people.

  • Elaine (she’s Jewish)
  • SHE (I don’t need to tell you the story again do I?)
  • Nomi Malone
  • Andrew Carver
  • Adnan Ghalib
  • Kanye West
  • Kevin Jonas
  • Joe Jonas
  • Nick Jonas
  • John McCain (but Sarah Palin can get a present because she’s just too folsky)
  • Yes on Prop 8
  • Mr. Blagojevich
  • The girl who stole Elaine’s officer position in GSA
  • Kevin A., the Santa Imposter (who gave me a lump of coal in SAVY Club)
  • Miley Cyrus
  • Tigger, my Chihuahua for his insatiable desire for my leg.

There you go Santa, I hope that little bit helps you a lot!

Expect some cookies at my house Santa, while you drop off my new car!

Always Yours,

Josh

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2 Responses to “Dear Santa,”


  1. 1 echomikeromeo December 25, 2008 at 2:29 am

    Who’s the chick who stole Elaine’s officer position? Someone tell me this story.

  2. 2 jepartyservice December 25, 2008 at 4:27 am

    First of all, I’d just like to let everyone I know feel better so don’t worry!

    And now for the story:

    Around the end of the year in GSA we were selecting the new officers for 2009. Stephen was president and Rachel was vice president and then they asked Hilary to be secretary and me to be event coordinator. I agreed and we all gave them our emails and everything.

    Over the summer Hilary said that she got an email about next year, but I never did.

    Then the fist meeting of GSA 2009 they have the officers listed on the whiteboard:
    President – Stephen
    Vice president – Rachel
    Secretary – Hilary
    Event Coordinator – S*****

    Obviously, I was devastated. And that is why S***** will not be getting a visit from Santa this year.


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Contact Elaine and Josh!

Want to say something to us? Don't feel like you can post a comment? No problem! You can get in contact with us here.

Elaine and Josh:

jepartyservice@gmail.com

Elaine:

elgray21@student.scad.edu

Josh:

jl3456@columbia.edu


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