Archive for November, 2008

Hello, New Readers!

Hello! Have you found our little blog because you came from the link in our YouTube video “I Am…Britney Spears Fan”? Or maybe you’re an old reader and you haven’t seen it yet?

Any reader, new or old, is always welcome and wanted at Bosh With Elaine and Josh, and we hope that you’ll stick around. Be on the look out for future videos!!

Why am I so Awkward?!

I’ve asked this question to the powers that be many times, and it only seems to be getting worse as I age.

This may be a common problem, but whenever I am in a conversation with someone I don’t know TOO well, I always get nervous and say something really strange, random, or completely inappropriate.

Here are some of my favourite examples:

  • By chance, I randomly meet Jeremy, an old acquaintance, in Harvard Yard while I’m touring the campus (he’s a current student). At one point he says to me, “It was nice seeing you again!” to which I accidentally and awkwardly reply, “yeah, no problem!” I’m not an asshole, I swear! I don’t think letting you see me again is a gift from me to you!
  • While leaving a message on a teacher’s voicemail, I said “thank you… thank you very much,” and now she’s going to think I talk like Elvis.
  • Whenever I want to say “goodbye” when I’m having a conversation in French, I end up saying “bonjour” and the other person hangs up/leaves before I can say “au revoir”.
  • If there is a situation where I know someone, but don’t really “know” them, but I still feel obligated to say hello, I just whimper a little “hey!” and then try to run away as fast as I can.

The bottom line is that people I don’t know very well make me nervous when they talk to me one on one, and especially when I talk to their voicemail.

But for you fellow awkers out there, my Yale interview was fine, so you still have hope!

In my opinion, my problem is, is that there are too many pleasantries exchanged in the English language and all of them flood my head at the same time and I just choose the wrong one… everytime.

Hi Your Welcome,

Josh

Giving Thanks 2

So Elaine already did this and Thanksgiving already passed, but I’m going to do my list of things to be thankful for anyway.

For the year of 2008, I am most thankful for:

  • Britney Spears
  • Mark Zuckerberg
  • 4th period Poli Sci (on Monday and Friday only) [because on these days we actually don’t have class and I eat out with family]
  • My mattress
  • My Poli Sci family
  • My real family and Tigger
  • Madrigal
  • The Jonas Brothers… JK!
  • My best friend who likes to pretend that she has other friends but really doesn’t (I know Shandra isn’t real!).
  • All you readers out there reading this!
  • My driver’s license
  • Rhonda Byrnes
  • People who think the weird things I do are at least a little bit funny.
  • Europe
  • France
  • Senioritis

Without all of these things, and in particular, Britney Spears, life would be cold, sad, and bitter.

Special shoutout to all the French people out there for just being what you are– rude, elitist and generally good-looking!

And to all the turkeys in the hizzouse… I’m really sorry. But better you than me.

Best,

Josh

Giving Thanks

Well, it’s that time of year that Americans take stock of their lives and give thanks for what they have. Here is a list of people and things that I (Elaine) am thankful for:

  • Britney Spears
  • Tim Curry
  • Richard O’brien
  • My iPod
  • CATS 2-disc London recording
  • That I got to see Eddie Izzard over the summer
  • My dogs and cats (despite always being covered in pet hair)
  • My well-worn teddy bear, Dudley
  • Vh1 reality shows
  • Netflix
  • The Internet
  • My red and purple room
  • That next year I’ll be writing this from a dorm room
  • My family (most of the time…)
  • And my best friend in the whole world, who really gets me and can basically read my mind: Sandra!

What are you thankful for?

PS I’m also very thankful that Brit’s beating Slipknot by about 400,000 in the Fuse contest! Keep voting! http://www.fuse.tv/music/best-of-2008/

The Most Important Day of 2008

Okay, so Elaine started this post, but all she wrote was the title, “The Most Important Day of 2008”.

Because I know Elaine quite well, just from this title, I already know what she was going to talk about. It is a day more joyous than Elaine’s birthday, or even mine, or even yours dear reader.

In fact, it happens to be the day our dear Savior Jesus Christ saved us from eternal damnation. That day, my friends, is December 2nd… the day of the birth of Britney Spears in the year 1981 of our Lord (or the year 0 ABS).

This year, December 2nd represents a resurrection and a second coming, all rolled up into one day.

I’ll let Elaine explain why December 2nd is, in fact, the Most Important Day of 2008…

It’s Elaine now. I guess it’s good to have a bestie who knows your thoughts from five words and four numbers (stay tuned for a post about our other mind-reading abilties in the coming days)!

But then again, I guess that you don’t have to be my bestie to know what’s been on my mind lately.

December 2nd, 2008 represents Britney Spears’ 27th birthday, as well as the day that her new studio album “Circus” is released.

Dear friends, I cannot use written or spoken words to describe the feeling that rushes through my body when I think about “Circus”. Let me try to use my new favorite medium of dance to describe it to you:

Okay, so that’s not me. But I think that it sort of sums up my wealth of emotion about 12/2/08.

I fell in love with Britney with the release of 2007’s “Blackout”. I had casually liked her through elementary school, forgot about her in middle school, and then, in the eleventh grade found her again. It was in the middle of her hard year. I don’t need to go into details. You know. But when I heard “Blackout”, it was just so good. Everything was so good. And I accepted Britney, let her enter my heart, and fill it with love and joy.

I showed the CD to Josh (but I wasn’t embarrassed to admitting to him that I loved a Britney Spears CD because I regularly get emails from him with subjects like, “I’m working on a new opera”, or “My a cappella version of ‘Moon River'”).

Anyways, we started to really get into all her music, and the culmination of this was the 26th birthday party that we threw her last year.

Since then we’ve really followed her every move, and naturally, this CD is a giant leap.

Why do I love Britney Spears?

Where to begin. My favorite music includes David Bowie, The Who, Elton John, The Beatles, Iggy Pop, Lou Reed…Britney Spears. I know that she doesn’t have deep/soulful/meaningful lyrics (she hardly even writes!), and none of her songs are musically significant, but…I just love how fun they are. And how easy they are to dance to first thing in the morning in your pajamas, or down at the club with your homies.

I just love everything about her. Every topless photo shoot, every thong-worn-over-jeans, every bump and grind on the dance floor: she may not be role model material, but I don’t care. She’s nothing but Britney.

Everyone, please buy “Circus” on December 2nd. Even if it’s just a few tracks from iTunes. (But once you hear it, you won’t want to stop!!)

Let’s support a woman who has had a tough time. Who is being honest about it, and who is trying to get herself reestablished in the harsh world of show business.

And let’s support an artist who is real.

Real sexy, that is!

britneyspears104

This is Josh again. I just wanted to say that I approve this message.

How “Complicated” by Avril Lavigne applies to my life.

Now you have to excuse me. I came home really angry and ready to write a scathing blog post about how much my parents disappoint me, but then I read some really awesome Britney news and everything was better.

So at best, this blog post can only be lukewarm because with Britney’s “Circus” music video coming out on December 5th, how can anyone be sad? Plus, she’s beating Slipknot by almost 200,000 votes on fuse (to widen that gap, go to: Best of 2008)!

But now back to the anger.

This week we have a guest from China staying at our house– one of my parents’ customers and forced friend (as Carla Bruni described the relationship between Sarkozy and GW Bush, “well… they have to [get along],”).

Up until tonight, I’ve been very good at avoiding this guest and having to eat dinner with this guest because I’ve been all over the place (which really means one of four places: my house, Santana’s Mexican Grill, Elaine’s house, or McCafé). However, I couldn’t get out of it tonight and I had to go out to Viet food with my parents and the guest.

You may think I’m rude for trying to avoid a guest, but you just don’t understand.

You see, my life is just like “Complicated” by Avril Lavigne. Allow me to quote some of the beautiful poetry:

You’re watching your back/ Like you can’t relax./ You’re trying to be cool/ but you look like a fool to me.

Continue reading ‘How “Complicated” by Avril Lavigne applies to my life.’

For Ummmmmm: LOL @ H8!

So Elaine and I recently did an opinion piece on the teenbop phenomenon known as “The Jonas Brothers”. I was fortunate enough to have stumbled upon this youtube gem:

All I got to say Ummmmmm is that aren’t you glad we aren’t like this girl? At least we left out the scary music!

I don’t know why I think that video is funny… I think it’s because I can imagine some angry, punk girl sitting at her computer making a bunch of title cards with Windows Movie Maker and cursing at the world. Now THAT’S comedy!

I do like that UndeadAngel993 is really sassy like Miss B though (that’s Beyoncé for y’all who don’t learn dance from Coca).

And UndeadAngel993 cusses a lot. That’s always good.

See, sometimes hate can be funny!

Are You There, Ilene Chaiken? It’s Me, Elaine.

Dear Ilene Chaiken,

What’s going on? I feel that as a loyal fan of The L Word I’ve put up with a lot. Bizarre story lines, huge leaps of faith, and sudden complete character changes, but this is almost too much.

image_01

At first sight, I thought this poster was a little over the top, but fine. I’m glad to see Alice and Tasha together, and of course, Tina and Better. Oh, hi, Helena! Glad to have you back!

And then…

What is going on in the lower left corner. Is that Jenny? Who would want to lick Je — HOLY SHIT! IS THAT SHANE??

Ilene, I have to tell you right now: if Jenny and Shane get together, I’m done. In fact, it’s been hard enough to get through five seasons of Jenny Schecter, and now this?

If I remember correctly, the last episode of season five has Jenny telling Shane, “You’ve broken my heart”, after finding her with…what was that actress’ name that Jenny was in love with? I don’t want to think about “Lez Girls”. Which might be the worst thing ever to happen in The L Word‘s history. Wait, maybe the worst thing was Adele? Or maybe when Jenny got Sounder dog because she was in love with the veterinarian.(There’s a lot of choose from).

I wish that Jenny and Sounder had just sailed off that night that were on the little raft together at the end of season four.

Is Jenny Schecter anyone’s favorite character?

Is she even remotely bearable to anyone?

In conclusion, Ilene, please, please, please don’t let Jenny and Shane get together in season six. Please let this licking thing just be for a provocative poster (even though they clearly have put couples together).

Yours truly,

Elaine

PS Ilene, I will write again later about these truly disturbing rumors about the Alice spin-off.

Test of Loyalty

I love Britney Spears.

I love Britney Spears.

I love Britney Spears.

But I can’t help my new found obsession for Beyonce’s hot video for her hot single, “Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It”.

I mean, look at the legs moves that the girl has!

I’m working on learning the dance. I’m serious about this. Dance is my new passion.

But in the end, there’s only one pop princess who owns my heart.

It’s really Beyonce’s loss. I’m a  good fan to have.

The 2008 “America’s Top East Coast College Rankings” (by Josh)

Hello future anxious college applicant, this is current anxious college applicant Josh here with the official release of the 2008 Top East Coast College Rankings.

Now, I don’t actually believe in college rankings, which might make you wonder, “why did you create your own college ranking?” And that is because I have decided to rank all of the east coast colleges in America along a number of different categories that matter to me. There’s no konky formula, no stats. It’s just my raw, biased opinion.

And in that respect, my rankings are just as good as US News’!

You might also be wondering, “why just the east coast?” and “why are there only 6 colleges?” The answer is simple: these are the only 6 I visited. You’re on your own with the other 482.

Now on to the rankings!

PRE-VISIT IMPRESSION:

  1. Columbia
  2. Yale
  3. Brown
  4. Princeton
  5. Harvard
  6. MIT

AWESOMENESS OF SURROUNDING CITY/TOWN/VILLAGE:

  1. Harvard (Cambridge/Boston, MA)
  2. MIT (Cambridge/Boston, MA)
  3. Columbia (New York City, NY)
  4. Brown (Providence, RI)
  5. Yale (New Haven, CT)
  6. Princeton (Princeton, NJ)

COOLNESS OF TOUR GUIDE (excluding Emily, the super cool underground tour guide):

  1. Columbia (Heather, hip asian girl)
  2. Harvard (Carl, San Diegan drama artiste)
  3. Yale (Matt, preppy J-Crew sweater guy)
  4. Princeton (Matt, flamboyant Religion major)
  5. Brown (Vitash?, pretty cool Indian guy)

MIT (Mark, human robot/über dweeb) is not ranked in this category because it doesn’t even deserve number 6. ABSOLUTE ABOMINATION.

GENERAL IMPRESSION OF CAMPUS AESTHETICS:

  1. Princeton (for simply being amazing)
  2. Yale (for it’s many maple trees)
  3. Brown (for the beautiful Lincoln Field and Van Wickle gates)
  4. Harvard (for a disappointing Harvard Yard)
  5. Columbia (for its small size, and somewhat run-down condition)
  6. MIT (again, ABSOLUTE ABOMINATION)

FOOD, EITHER FROM DINING HALL OR CAMPUS CAFETERIAS:

  1. Princeton (an award-winning cafeteria?!)
  2. Columbia (I had a pretty good chicken breast sandwich)
  3. Brown (ate at the dining hall, large selection!)
  4. Harvard (decent Chinese, but wasn’t university affiliated…)

Yale and MIT are not ranked because I did not eat there.

BADASSINESS OF STUDENT POPULATION:

  1. Columbia (student quote: “dude, all I do is sit here all day and smoke.”)
  2. Princeton (from the many stories Emily, underground tourguide, tells me)
  3. Yale (two students smoking in dorm and staring at the tour group, laughing)
  4. Harvard (just using my imagination…)
  5. MIT (for all those, sometimes clever, “hacks” they do)
  6. Brown (I honestly just have no idea)

ACCESSIBILITY TO ILLICIT SUBSTANCES:

This is a six-way tie for number one.

LIKELIHOOD MY PARENTS WOULD VISIT ME OFTEN (in this case, #1 is the worst):

  1. Brown (the city is too pleasant)
  2. Princeton (the surrounding town has too much available real estate for comfort)
  3. Harvard (again, too pleasant of a city, and there’s an Inn on campus)
  4. Yale (pleasant town, but hard to get to without a car)
  5. MIT (atrocious school, but good location)
  6. Columbia (I can assure you, my parents will never want to come to NYC)

OVERALL RANKING:

  1. Harvard University
  2. Columbia University
  3. Princeton University
  4. Yale University
  5. Brown University

MIT sucked so bad, it doesn’t get a ranking.

Opinions: The Jonas Brothers

Tonight in the cultural capital of America (San Diego, duh), we are blessed with the visit of the boy-band phenomenon: The Jonas Brothers. The numbers and screaming girls don’t lie: they are extremely popular and extremely loved. But what do the pop culture savvy Elaine and Josh think about the trio?

Nick, Kevin and Joe Jonas.

Nick, Kevin and Joe Jonas.

ELAINE: I despise the Jonas Brothers with every fiber of my being. First of all, look at them. I mean REALLY look at them. They are all horribly unattractive! I always hear people talking about how hot they are, but sorry, no. Kevin Jonas looks like a pig. The nose makes it uncanny. But getting past the superficial level, let’s talk about the music. Sorry. What music? Believe me, I understand that music does not need to be art to be good; sometimes a sing-a-long track or dance music is so much better then something that’s supposed to be meaningful, but come on! But I’ll be honest, the main reason I hate them is their purity rings. Gross! Who wants to fantasize about these asexual Christian “rock stars”? Can it get any more boring? They themselves seem like the most boring people in the world.

Let’s review: ugly, untalented, conservative and traditional…that is not something I want anywhere near my life, let alone my iPod. Not when there are alternatives like the pretty, mega-talented, and crazy Britney out there.

JOSH: No, I don’t have some sort of inferiority complex. No, I’m not vengefully jealous. It’s simple: I don’t like the Jonas Brothers. Admittedly, I don’t think I’ve ever listened to one of their songs all the way through and luckily life makes it so I don’t have to. No director wants their music in movies or TV Shows (with the exception of Disney Channel). No DJ ever plays their music on the radio (with the exception of Radio Disney). No store owner wants to play their music over the speakers (with the exception of the Disney store and Limited Too).

I’ve heard the Jonas Brothers likened to the Beatles and that’s just absolutely preposterous. If anything, this is just another Disney commercial success– another Mickey Mouse if you will. How could these 3 “musicians” who sing conservative songs about liking girls who don’t like them back and the like be anything like the Beatles? The Beatles were shocking for their time; they sang about sex. They were parents’ worst nightmares. The Jonas Brothers need parental acceptance or their fan base would collapse. You know who the Jonas Brothers remind me of? Hansen. And 10 years after Hansen, how many Hansen songs can you name from memory? One? Maybe two if you were a “fan” back then. How many Beatles songs can you name? Everyone can name at least 5, maybe even 10. And it’s been almost 50 years since the Beatles exploded. An average person could even name 5 Britney Spears songs.

How many Jonas Brothers songs can I name?

Just one. And I have a feeling that number isn’t ever going to change.

The Boy Wizard Who Fell to Earth

I am so excited about these pictures of Daniel Radcliffe that were in the October issue of Details:

details_right

details_photo3

Everybody must know that these pictures are modeled after one of the greatest films ever made: The Man Who Fell to Earth.

What? You’ve never heard of The Man Who Fell to Earth? Well, ladies and gentlemen, you are truly missing something special.

It is an adaption of a sci-fi novel that tells the story of Thomas J. Newton, an alien, who comes to Earth in search of water for his dying planet. However, he falls to the corruption of the American ways and fails to return home.

Oh yeah. It also stars David Bowie.

It’s very unique, indeed, and is quite the experience to watch.

After being exposed to this movie, you will forever have a new vocabulary of references that include: ” the indoor ping-pong room”, “throwing off the wig and up the cookies”, “wet alien sex”, “get out of my mind, all of you”, and most importantly and most memorably: “the gun scene” (which truly is the greatest scene in all of cinema).

I am dying to talk to Harry Potter about The Man Who Fell to Earth. I’m imagining that it’s the reason that he wanted to become and actor and that he’s seen it a million times.

For comparison’s sake, here the pictures of David Bowie in the movie:

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To the Other Three People That Watch “The Riches”

It’s no secret that I have been obsessed with British, transvestite comedian/”actor” Eddie Izzard since ninth grade.

I’ve religiously memorized his stand-up routines and rented all his shitty movies. (Sorry, Eddie!)

I even got to see his show live this summer <33333

But one of the most exciting things for Eddie fans was the television series The Riches. And unlike many of his other acting pursuits, it was actually good.

For those of you who didn’t watch it (i.e. anyone who is not an Eddie Izzard fan) the show follows a family of gypsy/con-artists who, through a wacky series of events, end up assuming the identity of a well-to-do family, and have to live the lie.

Well, do the fact that no one watched it (despite it’s critical acclaim and Emmy nomination) it was canceled. It ran two good seasons. It will be deeply missed.

But I read today that…

“I’ve posed to the heads of FX and TBS that we want to make a film. And they said, “Right, we’ll support you.” “Eddie hopes to raise finances for the silver screen version of The Riches on the Internet. He also wants to make it a “road move, shooting in Louisiana and New Mexico, everywhere that they steal,” he exclaims. “We’ll do it by the skin on our teeth.” (from OK Magazine)

Please, please Jesus/Allah/Buddha/God/Secret/Mother Nature let this be true!!!!

Because I feel like I know Mr. Eddie Izzard, I know that this would mean the world to him.

And if they got those same quirky writers and elements of the show, it would be really good!

Celebration…Almost

First of all, I am beyond thrilled to have this man as the president:

Josh and I had just finished our shift standing a hundred feet from a polling place with a No on Prop 8 sign, and right when we got into the car and turned on the radio we heard Mr. John McCain saying “…and I concede the presidency…” we were shocked and surprised. It was quite a nice moment. A good story for  “Where Were You When You Heard that Barack Obama Was Elected”?

But…

I can’t quite completely celebrate.

Obviously (no on) Prop 8 was something that I was passionate about, and I am beyond disappointing and frustrated at it’s passing.

(To be fair, it’s not OFFICIAL, official. There are still votes to count. We haven’t conceded. But all the other headlines are declaring it’s passing).

I’m just heartbroken. I truly believed that it would fail. That the people of California would be above “writing discrimination into the constitution” in the year 2008.

I just don’t understand. And they abundance of Yes signs around Scripps Ranch make me want out more than ever.

Standing on that corner (in La Jolla) the night of the election also gave me hope. There were lots of honks, thumbs up and fists in the air. People walking by stopped to thank us and tell us that they voted no. Upon seeing us, a mom asked her daugher, “Christina, remember when we talked about marriage? Did you think that a boy could marry a boy?” The little girl nodded and smiled.

However, despite Christina’s backing , children posed our only opposition.

A little girl no older than eight sat in her dad’s pick up truck, and when she was stopped at a red light, looked at us and gave us a big thumbs down and scoweled.

At around 7:30 PM, a boy probably between eleven and fourteen rode past us on his bike. He yelled “Faggot!” as he rode us.

It was the parents of these children who passed Prop 8.

But the fight is just beginning. Court cases are starting today. And there’s definetley something to be said in that they only won by four percent.

But enough of that…

Barack Obama is such a success for America. And for maybe the first time in my short life, I feel proud to be an American.

(But not proud so much a Scripps Ranch-ian or a Californian).

Dinner Conversations with the Lins

When I was kid, I would scare my parents by building couch-cushin towers, sitting on top of them and toppling over. As fun as that was, that got pretty old. So I tried exerting negative, angry auras around them, but I soon found out that didn’t scare them at all.

Nowadays, all I have to do to scare my parents is tell them my interests.

With college apps underway, my parents keep on nagging so I’ve become especially interested in pissing them off. To do this, I simply tell them that I want to be one of four things (depending on my mood and the circumstance):

  1. French translator/interpreter
  2. A playwright/screenplay writer
  3. A singer of the back-up vocal variety
  4. An architect (the least severe of the four)

My parents seem okay with architect, but they are always suggesting the words “mechanical” and “engineer”.

Today I felt like really pissing my parents off so I brought up singing opera. When I tried to explain that I should get the chance to pursue what I want for the experience, my mom popped out this gem:

“Your dad and I have eaten more salt than you’ve eaten rice.”

I know they sound like concerned and loving parents, but they’re really just scared that I’ll end up being a hobo.

But whatever, I’m going to do/study what I want and according to FERPA I don’t technically have to tell them anything about the classes I’m taking et..

Yay FERPA!

I can’t live with these people much longer. Don’t they realize that the more they tell me to be an engineer, the more I DON’T want to be one?

And they’re voting Yes on 8! How could it get any worse?


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Contact Elaine and Josh!

Want to say something to us? Don't feel like you can post a comment? No problem! You can get in contact with us here.

Elaine and Josh:

jepartyservice@gmail.com

Elaine:

elgray21@student.scad.edu

Josh:

jl3456@columbia.edu