Archive for October, 2008

Write to Marry

Write to Marry Day

Josh and I live in California, and every day on our way to school we see tons of campaign signs, both for and against Prop 8. Today there was a “Yes” article in the school newspaper, and I would like to provide you with some of REAL exceprts of conversations I have heard among my peers:

  • “In twenty years, three men will want to marry each other. It will all go from here.”
  • “It will make more people gay.”
  • “Gay relationships don’t last as long as normal relationships.”
  • “They can’t reproduce.”
  • “I don’t want my brother to learn about it in school.”

But maybe the most ludicrous thing is the actual slogans from the Yes side. “Protect traditional marriage”. How does this harm those who are already in heterosexual marriages, or will be, at all? I’m pretty sure that marriage is two people joining in love, and that’s the same for two men, two women, or even a man and a woman.

And for people who say “why can’t they just have civil unions”? I guess that I’ll have to quote Ellen DeGeneres who told John McCain, “It sounds like your saying ‘You can sit here, but you can’t sit here'”.

I don’t want to talk about the religious thing. How many atheists marry? How many just plan-old non-Christians marry. My rabbi is a lesbian. I don’t know much about this Jesus fellow, but he seems like a pretty nice guy. I think that he’d be okay with it. I really do. And I know that my God would want everybody to be happy. Is it okay if I quote a little Queer as Folk? Sorry, I can’t help myself. Take it away, Ted!

I think God appreciates it even more because He created you in His image. At least that’s what I was always taught. And since God is love and God doesn’t make mistakes, then you must be exactly the way he wants you to be, the way he intended you to be. And that goes for every person, every planet, every mountain, every grain of sand, every song, every tear, and every faggot. We’re all His, Emmett. He loves us all.

I wish that I could vote. But I can’t. And if you can, there’s only one right (write?) thing to do. It’s plain and simple: Proposition 8 is bigoted discrimination. And that’s not the California I want to live in.

Vote No on Prop 8.

Christmas Came Early!

Dear God,

Thank You for showing me that the gifts You’ve placed in my life aren’t for me at all – they are intended to bring glory to You. Now that I know the truth, I don’t hold back. I work to identify and develop every single gift, and when someone asks me about them –

Oh.

Hello.

I didn’t notice you there.

I was just praying to God Almighty and thanking Him for the gift I received today from my good friend Josh, Anytime Prayers for Everyday Teens.

Obviously anyone would think of me when they saw this book. And it truly is special.

It’s a collection of many prayers for a busy teenager, like me, who needs to quickly reach out to Lord God. Here are some of the prayers included in the book:

  • When I need help paying my bills
  • When I’m having trouble with my boyfriend
  • When I don’t want to go to church
  • When I’m concerned about dating
  • When I’m being harassed by enemies
  • When I’m facing a big exam
  • When my grades are slipping
  • When I need a job
  • When my parents don’t understand me
  • When I’m trying to balance a busy schedule
  • When I can’t sleep
  • When I’ve been involved with gossip
  • When my friend or family member is dealing with infertility
  • And lots more!

Obviously, I’ll be carrying this book with my everywhere I go, just incase a need a quick work with Him throughout the day.

And I’ll also share some of the beautiful words in this blog now and again.

Thanks, Josh! These words will truly bring meaning to my life.

And look forward to tomorrow’s post, where we will be participating in this: http://www.mombian.com/2008/10/24/join-us-for-write-to-marry-day/

One Time, At Choir Camp…

Last weekend I was at Girl Scout camp, and now Josh is at a choir retreat thing. (How cool are we??) But I thought that I would try my hand at blogging his weekend. I wouldn’t be surprised if I was as close to what really happened as he was for me:

Friday October 24, 2008

Dear Diary,

I had to leave right after school today. I’m dissapointed that I couldn’t start the political adventure Elaine and I had planned, but oh well. That’s life. People get cut.

The bus ride was pretty awk. First we sang for a little bit, but then when everyone started talking about High School Musical 3 and I didn’t know what to say. I started listening to Womanizer.

Finally we got to camp. It is so gross up here! I don’t even have access to a sink to do my daily Rogaine routine! This must be how Nomi Malone felt when she was hitch hiking through the desert.

Saturday October 25, 2008

Dear Diary,

Today I was planning on working on my college essays, but instead I found a store that sells black cowboy hats! I tried them all on and fantasized about being Cristal Conners. I practiced the dance. But I was so caught up in it that I forgot that I was supposed to be singing!

I ran over the rest of the group and we had a really nice practice.

We really bonded. Everyone had to share the most important moment of their life so far. Of course, I talked about Britney. I started to cry, and everyone did, too. I think we’re really tight now, and I’ve made some friends for life.

But unfortunately, I didn’t get any writing done. I’m so screwed.

OMG GMA!

You might be aware that Josh and I are something of Britney Spears fans?

Well, today I read on my fave website, britney.com, that Brit will be celebrating her 27th birthday and release of Circus on Good Morning America! She’ll be performing, too! Of course, we have to wait until the holy day, December 2nd, but it will for sure be worth it.

Here is the terribly produced TV spot that they made:

How cute is she?? How much do you love it whens she asks “Now, how sweet is that?” And gives that really confused look like she’s really wondering exactly how sweet it is.

Ah, what a fine time to be a Britney Spears fan.

Thank you Jesus

Dear Jesus and/or Secret,

Thank you for not making me a complete idiot and for making me have an IQ greater than a monkey’s. I really appreciate it.

Today I was listening to the radio (of course to Channel 93.3, the only station that plays “Womanizer” [I’m still working on getting some airplay on Kyxy Soft Rock 96.5]), and the host had a little riddle titled “What’s in My Pants?” where basically you had to guess what was in his pants from three clues and then you could win tickets. Obviously the game was made for dirty minds. Here were the three clues:

  1. You have to be careful with it or the tip might break.
  2. The more you use it, the smaller it gets.
  3. It almost always carries a rubber.

So obviously Jesus, the answer is “pencil”. But a girl who was unlucky enough to broadcast her stupidity around San Diego guessed… wait for it…

Q-TIP.

WTF Jesus?! Why did you do that to this poor girl? What did she do to deserve this?

But I don’t mind, as long as it’s not me.

Once again, thank you for everything, especially all those holidays we celebrate for you because I know that’s just you making sure I don’t have to go to school all the time.

Yours in earnest,

Josh

I’m Home!

So I did just get back from Girl Scout camp, and Josh really was scarily accurate. I’ll just add a few more details:

I have never been so active! To get to camp it was a fourth-of-a-mile hike up hill. We kayaked for hours and then went snorkeling. And I wasn’t even afraid of sharks! I didn’t cry once!

It was more fun then I thought it would be. I was really surprised that I enjoyed nature so much.

But that was enough of it.

Love,

Elaine

To gift or not to gift?

So yesterday I went to Marshall’s with my mom and my sister (which I found to be 10 times better than Ross) and as I was looking around I spotted the perfect gift for Elaine! Of course I had to buy it, but I’m not sure if I should give it to her now because there isn’t really any special occasion coming up or anything. So I thought I would test out the new wordpress poll feature and let you, our loyal reader(s?), decide.

I obviously can’t tell you what it is, but I’m sure Elaine will blog about it after she gets it!

“Adventures in Wonderland”, or “Elaine is a Girl Scout”.

Elaine is away at Girl Scout adventure camp this weekend so she won’t be able to blog for your pleasure.

So I thought I’d be a real friend and blog this whole weekend for her! It’s almost scary that I’m able to do this and be nearly 80% correct with my event facts.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Dear Diary,

This morning I woke up at 6AM to go to Girl Scout adventure camp. I’m so excited! Mainly I’m excited because I won’t have to deal with my bitchy sister, Meredith, all week! Yay!

It is 6 in the morning though. But I bet Britney gets up at 6 in the morning. How else would she get abs like that? Damn. I wish my workout video (that Josh embarrassingly saw hiding in my drawer) would give me abs like Britney’s. She’s so fine.

The drive up was kind of awkward. I just wish I could rock out to “Womanizer” or “I’ll Love You ‘Till Tuesday”. But I don’t want her to think I’m a freak. What ever would I do if someone thought I was weird? I think that would corrupt my rigid moral values.

Josh better remember to sign me up for the Harvard presentation. I have a strange feeling he forgot. Honestly, the only thing stopping me from going to college is his lazy ass. I’m basically applying to college for him.

If I don’t get into Harvard, I’ll know who to blame.

We just played the license plate game. I saw a plate from Montana. Who the hell lives in Montana?

Your Best Friend,

Elaine Rose Gray ❤ Tim Curry!!!

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Dear Diary,

Today I saw a boy. And I wonder if he looked at me, he took my breath away.

Sorry Diary, I just had to do that. I miss Britney so much!

This morning me and the gals went kayaking which I surprisingly had a fun time doing despite my general dislike for physical activity and water. Josh tried calling me this morning– I don’t know why. It was probably something really cool and then when I get back to him he won’t remember. So typical.

Tim Curry. Tim Curry. TC.

Elaine Rose Gray Curry. Elaine Curry. Mrs. Elaine Rose Gray-Curry.

Mr. Elaine Curry is Tim Curry.

I love you. Even if you are the voice of an obese cat.

You’re a Womanizer Tim Curry.

Thanks Diary,

Elaine Rose Gray-Curry

My Weekend

Besides for the Womanizer premier, it wasn’t very exciting.

I went to the zoo with my mommy and daddy on Saturday. No present sister meant no fighting or anger, which actually resulted in a nice afternoon. I saw an iguana sneeze. That was pretty exciting.

And today I stayed in my pajamas all day, never left the house, and filled out applications and wrote essays all day.

I guess the new chapter of this blog will be “Elaine and Josh Go To College”.

Here’s where I’m applying , in amphibolical order:

Emerson College

College of Santa Fe

Columbia College of Hollywood

Savannah College of Art and Design

SFSU

CSU Fullerton

I feel stressed.


Well my weekend, besides the Womanizer video premier, was also very unexciting. I spent 12 hours at an MUN Conference and came out with a fancy piece of paper (that I’m very of proud of actually). I’m just a little pissed because there was a bitch from Huntington Beach that pushed me out of the formal caucus.

For you non-MUNerds, it doesn’t matter. Just understand that she was a big bitch and stole valuable points from me.

As for colleges, high school is intent on making everything so difficult– why do I have so much homework? Shouldn’t I be given some time to just work on my apps? Doing apps is even kind of fun! I just don’t have time! I officially blame all my procrastination problems on school. And Facebook. And Britney Spears.

Recently I decided (for the second time) that I would for SURE do an architecture portfolio but as the days tick by and get closer and closer to the deadline, that dream is slowly dying. It’s really too bad.

College list in amphibolical order:

Columbia

Yale

Harvard

Brown

Washington U in St. Louis

UC Berkeley (I can’t even fucking spell it!)

UCLA

MIT?

Princeton?

The only good things in my life right now are Womanizer and eating out at lunch during 4th period Poli Sci.

Please Jesus, just let it be December 2nd already!

Yes on Prop 8?!

Now, I understand you love Jesus and everything, but Prop 8? What are you? From the stone age?

If live in California and you interact often with the LGBT community (or in my case, have a friend who is obsessed with the LGBT community) then you must have heard about Prop 8 before. Basically the Proposition wants to add to the California Constitution that “marriage is only between a man and a woman”.

I was really confused why anyone would ever vote yes on Prop 8. Who on earth would want to deny rights to fellow neighbors? Who on earth would ever deny two people the right to be a family?

But then I saw this ad. And suddenly I was enlightened:

I was enlightened; I realized– supporters of Prop 8 are just stupid cunts! Otherwise they wouldn’t believe this bullshit!

That’s right. I went there. I used the c-word.

Personally, I’m not familiar with the fairy tale “King & King” and I must have been absent the day of 2nd grade when they told me that princes could marry princes. I also must have been absent the day when the fact that princes could marry princes destroyed everybody’s psyches.

So then I started looking for more reasons to support Prop 8 and I was told that a marriage should be between a man and a woman because it was the way “nature” wanted it to be. Men and women are “meant to procreate” and thus a marriage where no procreation takes place is not valid.

Thanks for demeaning the human race as procreating creatures. Since when has marriage been solely a means for having children? What happened to marrying for love?

Really, I only care because Ellen DeGeneres is a lesbian and I’m really looking forward to a wedding invitation. I also just really hate people who would work so hard to deny other people’s happiness.

Let’s face it, if your kid doesn’t learn about homosexuality from school, who will they learn it from? Wouldn’t you prefer for your kid to learn about it in a safe environment?

Why do you want your kid to be a cunt like you?

This is Why the Entertainment Industry Needs Us

They’re making an Starz series of Crash??

WTF? That movie sucked (and I don’t mean the movie of the same title about people who fetishize car accidents. That might make an interesting series).

But honestly? There are far better films that deal with race issues. Just not starring Sandra Bullock.

Can we talk about Brendan Fraser’s acting skills? No, because they’re nonexistent.

But the ad that I got on the back of my Netflix envelope had Dennis “I’ll f*** anything that moves” Hopper, so maybe he’ll be better.

But still.

Gross.

(It’s true that I remain bitter from it stealing Brokeback‘s Oscar).

I would honestly rather watch the My Big Fat Greek Wedding series. What ever happened to that, anyways?

Britney is a Womanizer.

Recently an inquisitive someone asked me, “why is it that only Elaine writes on yours and Elaine’s blog?” And so I am here to fill the Josh void that has been plaguing this blog since post number 2.

But I will warn you. I’m not very funny. Next time hartknight, be careful what you wish for.

I didn’t post very often because I thought that I had other important things to do, but I realized today that all those things are actually unimportant whereas enlightening our loyal readers about what goes on in Elaine and I’s minds is kind of fun. So I’m postponing SAVY, MUN, SHF, and other miscellaneous acronyms’ work just for all of you.

And the most exciting occurence of the day is the anticipation of what is going to happen tomorrow!! Tomorrow, Oct. 7, 2008, Britney Spears new single “Womanizer” is going on sale on iTunes! Not only does that mean I’ll be able to support my number one woman, I’ll also cross my fingers and wait attentively by the radio for some radio play!

Brit demonstrates why she is a both womanizer and manizer.

Brit demonstrates why she is a both womanizer and manizer.

And just to add to the anticipation, the world premier of the “Womanizer” video is going to be aired this Friday during 20/20! (Why 20/20? We shall never know.)

So if you REALLY liked Elaine and Josh you would support Britney for us and buy her new single, in iTunes stores tomorrow!

But you can listen to it here, right on Bosh with Elaine and Josh before it hits the stores!

Why We Have No Other Friends

Instead of attending our Senior Homecoming last night, we ate dinner at our favorite restaurant, Santana’s Mexican Grill, and watched “the horror gem” Suspiria, starring none other then the #1 imitated singing voice: Jessica Harper.


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Contact Elaine and Josh!

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Elaine and Josh:

jepartyservice@gmail.com

Elaine:

elgray21@student.scad.edu

Josh:

jl3456@columbia.edu